Thanks To All The Emails This Year

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3,845
"Honey, really its just a protein worm".....Or "hey Babe wanta see a real protein worm". [SPAZ!]
 
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3,845
Danno, I don't make any money posting my political views either but hey life is short and protein is plentiful !!!! [Cheers!]
 
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5,336
Location
London, AR
I want to thank all of you! To all my friends and family, Thank you for making me safe, secure, blessed, and wealthy by sending me your **** chain letters over the last year. Because of your concern: * I no longer drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains. * I no longer drink Pepsi or Dr Pepper since the people who make these products are atheists who refuse to put "Under God" on their cans. * I no longer drink anything out of a can because I will get sick from the rat feces and urine. * I no longer use Saran wrap in the microwave because it causes cancer. * I no longer go to movies because I could sit on a needle infected with AIDS * I no longer check the coin return on pay phones because I could get pricked with a needle infected with AIDS. * I no longer want to pump my own gas - where I will either get AIDS or cause an explosion by cell phone or static. * I no longer use cancer causing deodorants even though I smell like a wet dog on a hot day. * I no longer go to shopping malls because someone will drug me with a perfume sample and try to rob me. * I no longer receive packages from UPS or FedEx since they are actually Al Qaida in disguise. * I no longer shop at Target since they are French and don't support our American troops. * I no longer drink Starbucks coffee because they don't support our American troops. * I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a stupid number for which I will get the phone bill from **** with calls to Uganda, Singapore, and Uzbekistan. * I no longer eat pre-packaged foods because the estrogens they contain will turn me gay. * I no longer eat KFC because their chickens are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers. * I no longer look at the opposite sex because they will take my kidneys and leave me taking a nap in a bath tub full of ice. * I no longer have a cell phone because I don't want brain cancer. * I no longer have any sneakers because I would hate to see all those poor kids in the sweat shops overseas suffering because I wanted a pair of Nike shoes. * I no longer buy expensive cookies from Neiman Marcus since I now have their recipe. * I no longer worry about my soul because I have 363,214 angels looking out for me. * I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl about to die in the hospital for the 1,000,000,000th time. * I no longer have any money but that will change once I receive the $18,624 that Microsoft and AOL are sending me since I participated in their special e-mail program. I want to thank all of you soooooooo much for looking out for me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now if you DON'T cut/paste this to at least 12,000,000 of your closest friends in the next 60 seconds a large bird with diarrhea will crap on your head at exactly 5:00 pm tomorrow!!!!!!!!! HURRRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! "
 
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