T-Shirt Sayings

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-Best T-Shirts- A Washington Post columnist prints a column each summer listing interesting T-shirts he observed at the Ocean City, MD, beach. Here's his 2003's best: --I childproofed my home...but they still get in. --(On the front) - 60 is not old. (On the back) - - If you're a tree. --I'm still hot! (It just comes in flashes.) --At my age, "getting lucky" means finding my car in the parking lot. --My reality check just bounced. --Life is short; make fun of it! --I'm not 50. I'm $49.95 plus tax. --Annapolis -- A drinking town...with a sailing problem. --I need somebody bad. Are you bad? --Physically Pfffffttt! --Buckle up. It makes it harder for the aliens to snatch you from your car. --I'm not a snob. I'm just better than you are. --It's my cat's world. I'm just here to open cans. --Earth is the insane asylum of the universe. --Keep staring . . I just may do a trick. --We got rid of the kids. The cat was allergic. --Dangerously under-medicated!! --My mind works like lightening. One brilliant flash, and it's gone! --Every time I hear the word "exercise"...I wash my mouth out with chocolate. --Cats regard people as warm-blooded furniture. --Live your life so that when you die, the preacher will not have to tell lies at your funeral. --In God we trust. All others we polygraph
 
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Here in Red Sox Nation, there is a T-Shirt that says: "My favorite baseball teams are the Red Sox and whoever is playing the Yankees"
 
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