What i do, and our J35 is still in decent shape...
I change the oil with syn 0w-20 or 5w-20 every 5,000 miles, regardless what the OLM says. The VCM on these is VERY hard on the engine and oil.
We have almost 100,000 trouble free miles on our Pilot. Early on, I think Trav that said a long time ago to change these J35s at 5,000 miles with a quality syn. That's what I've done, and I couldn't be happier. Ours burns very little oil and just kind of hums along.