Quotes/Bumper Stickers

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Source - Funny Quote


RaLpH (Donald)?- Clear as mud.

Bumper Sticker- It is as bad as you think, and they are out to get you.

Religious- Try J e s u s . If you don't like Him, the devil will always take you back.

Bumper Sticker- Woman who seek to be equal to men lack ambition.

Philosophical- If marketing executives could sell, then they would be salesmen.

Bumper Sticker- If seagulls hang around the bay. Why aren't they called bay gulls?

Bumper Sticker- Don't take my signals literally.

Bumper Sticker- It's lonely at the top, but you eat better.

Bumper Sticker- My wife's other car is a broom.

Bumper Sticker- I'm not deaf.. I'm just ignoring you.

Keanu Reeves- I mean really wonderful. In teaching. Personal epiphanies. About life. About different perspectives .. help with different perspectives that you have. You know what I mean? Relationships to nature. Relationships with the self. With other people. With events." Keanu Reeves, a 36 year old actor, spoke these words while discussing the "wonderful experiences" he's had with drugs.

Religious- What part of "THOU SHALT NOT" don't you understand?

Bumper Sticker- I drive the speed limit. If you don't like it call a cop!

Religious- Life has many choices. Eternity has two. What's yours?

Bumper Sticker- Go on, I'll see you at the next traffic light.

Religious- If you don't want to reap the fruits of sin, stay out of the devil's orchard.

Bumper Sticker- Next time you think you're perfect .. try walking on water!

Bumper Sticker- If you don't like the way I drive - get off the sidewalk.

Bumper Sticker- Warning: I brake for the heck of it.

Bumper Sticker- Hang up and drive.

Bumper Sticker- Sometimes I wake up grumpy, other times I let her sleep.

Bumper Sticker- Caution I swerve and hit people at random.

Bumper Sticker- Go on speeding, we'll cut you out (of your car) --Your Fire Department

Bumper Sticker- I just got a new car for my wife today. Best trade I ever made.

Bumper Sticker- Have you joined Thinker's Anonymous yet?
 
Mine: "The small pedal by your right foot? Press it and see what happens."

I'm still trying figure out how to get the message seen on my FRONT bumper however....
 
My favorite: "J@sus may love you but everyone else thinks your an @sshole."

"Wife and dog missing, reward for dog."
 
This one was around a long time ago, I live only a few hours from Three Mile Island.


Bumper Sticker-"Ted Kennedy Has Killed More People Than Nuclear Accidents."
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I saw this bumper sticker the other day:

35,000 battered women and all this time I have been eating them plain.
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Since we're (barely) on the topic of the conservative senator from Massachusetts:

Bumper sticker: My gun has killed fewer people than Ted Kennedy's car.

Dave
 
Also the wife and I both have rear window stickers on our rides with the outline of a running greyhound and the words "My Dog Is Faster Than Your Dog".
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quote:

Originally posted by Buzzsaw:
35,000 battered women and all this time I have been eating them plain.

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I did have that accidental fingernail in the eye episode several years ago, night vision in my left eye will never be normal, but I digress.
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[ February 11, 2005, 11:39 AM: Message edited by: JohnnyO ]
 
"A government with the policy to rob Peter to pay Paul can be assured
of the support of Paul"
- George Bernard Shaw

Duh! That's how our gov't works!

Build a man a fire and he'll be warm for a day.
Set a man on fire, he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
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Dave
 
Remember all those "I (heart image) my dog" or horse, or cat, etc. I always hated those. I remember someone offering a "screw image" sticker to cover up the "heart image". I thought that was good. (I still have a full box of those....)
 
I have considered getting the following:
"400 000 km later and I'm still getting 45MPG, how about you?"

another one is,
"The closer you get, the slower I go."

Steve
 
Oh yeah, one day I was following a guy in a red Escort. Across the back window was the following in 8" letters.

"The B I T C H Mobile"

I can't believe that guy would marry said woman or have the guts to drive her car...

Steve
 
How about the bumper sticker that says:

If you ride my bumper I will flick a booger on your windshield.
 
quote:

Originally posted by JohnnyO:
This one was around a long time ago, I live only a few hours from Three Mile Island.


Bumper Sticker-"Ted Kennedy Has Killed More People Than Nuclear Accidents."
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I was in Jr. High when that happened. My parents' house and the school were within the 5-mile evacuation radius.

I liked the shirts that were around then:

"I survived TMI. Now I'm sterile, wanna try?"
 
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