I should update my profile. I no longer live in Chicago. Now, if I didn't have a bum shoulder or could throw lefty, I could throw a rock into the Upper Peninsula from where I am sitting. In order to get to Rhinelander, WI I have to drive south an hour.
Also, this isn't just a parts counter guy, he's the owner and mechanic of the Napa Autocare Center. They do not stock any of those items. I spent 5 minutes looking around the store to find nothing, then I finally caught his attention and found that. The only greases he had were wheel bearing grease, white lithium greas and black synthetic lithium grease. No other grease except maybe some chicken or bacon grease back in the break room.
I found a couple of the products using google, but I've got some time Monday morning, so I'm going to drive to the real Napa store (yay for an hour of driving!) using a friend's car.