"If it Doesn't Make Sense"

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"When something doesn't make sense it's usually untrue." Famous quote from Judge Judy. Something I totally agree with and subscribe too. And an incident last night proved me correct.

Get a phone call from wife while at work. Her son (my stepson) was coming to pick her up from her daughter's house and bring her home. He's 18 and we usually don't let him borrow the car for various reasons which I won't go into. But yesterday he needed the car to get to and from work. Neither his mother or I were available to drive him. So, he had the car. Mistake I won't make again!

Anyway, she said to me that he got stopped by a trooper. A brake light was out. "Did he get a ticket?", I asked. "Not sure", was the reply. "But I'll find out when he picks me up." My Parental cow chip meter just went half scale. I just know there's more to this story.

She calls back about 10 minutes later. He got a ticket. For a freaking brake light being out! I start asking questions. Response I got was trooper said that if we came by HQ Monday by 5 PM with proof the brake light is fixed he'll squash the ticket. But why all that firedrill for a brake light out? Now my Parental cow chip meter is off the scale. Various thoughts came to mind like:

The kid gave the trooper diarrhea disrespect so he wrote him up rather than a verbal warning.

He got stopped for something else and ain't saying.

The trooper is just a **** and enjoys writing tickets.

According to my wife the first two items didn't occur so I'm left with the trooper being a ****. But I don't believe it. Anyway, when I got home this morning I checked the car. Sure enough, the right side brake light is out.

Fast forward to this afternoon. I go to Advance Auto to get a bulb so I have a receipt of proof that it's fixed. I bring the kid with me and plan to go to HQ to get the ticket squashed. Replace the bulb in the parking lot and check it. Works. While driving over to HQ this suddenly spills from his mouth: "I also got a ticket for 52 MPH in a 40 MPH zone. Can we take care of that ticket at HQ too?". Well, the truth comes out! The stoplight ticket was just an "Oh BTW ticket"! That cow chip meter wasn't pegged for nuthin. I knew something else happen here.

I told the Kid that you can't take care of the speeding ticket. You have to go to court and plead. It will probably cost him $300 or so. Anyway, get to HQ and they look at the receipt from Advance Auto. Didn't even look at the car. Signed off and squashed the "equipment malfunction" ticket. He's on his own for the speeding ticket.

And I wonder why I have grey hairs.
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This was a wise police officer. He knew if he had just given a speeding ticket, the kid could have paid it off and nobody would find out. So, he added the brake light, to make sure the car owner would find out.
 
Brake light out is probably what caught the cop's attention. $300 is pretty steep for most 18 year olds.
 
"When something doesn't make sense it's usually untrue."

thats probably one of the best pieces of advice that i currently follow. its just bulletproof. if something does not make sence, someone is lying and hasnt figured out a way to make it believable.
 
Someone should start a new thread: Raising teens. The first part is to share stories of raising your teens. The second part is for sharing stupid things I/we did as a teen. Just to keep us humble.
 
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Brake light out is probably what caught the cop's attention. $300 is pretty steep for most 18 year olds.




Actually it wasn't the brake light that caught his attention. The trooper was heading opposite him with the radar on. Once he swung around and pulled him over that's when the brake light was noticed.
 
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If the kid came clean right away, he'd have shown maturity.

Now, you have to wonder.





After the phone calls with me Sunday night he came "clean" with his mother and told her what really happen. She told him that he was going to have to tell me Monday and face the consequences.
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Someone should start a new thread: Raising teens. The first part is to share stories of raising your teens. The second part is for sharing stupid things I/we did as a teen. Just to keep us humble.




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Yes, keep honest people honest. How much anxiety did we cause our parents ..and is this just the universe's "payback"?

I often wondered when my son would surrender and submit to my rule for a favorable life. I find that my deity of choice has been asking me the same question for a very long time. I figured that he just wanted to give me a slight glimpse of things from his view. Some lessons can be very embarrassing when they get turned back upon you in realization.
 
Wow $300 for speeding, ouch. Interesting story. You learn a lot as a kid... When I was a fast and wreckless driver I passed a Highway patrol officer at 95 mph. He was out of his car at the time. He quickly radioed his partner to get me but by the time he got up to me I was doing 10 under the speed limit. After keeping me on the side of the road for about 20 mins they gave me a tinted windows ticket.

That was one of the few times I was scared so bad that I promised *** that I'd never race again. It sure worked and probably kept me from killing myself. Now 3 years later I drive within the speed limit and haven't been pulled over since.

Far as your kid - man $300 is steep for doing 12 over the limit. I know a relative in Iowa who was doing 20 over who got a $75 speeding ticket.
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I agree with DrinkDuff77 - If this is what constitutes 'reckless' or 'unacceptable' behaviour out of an 18-year old for you, count your blessings! There are a heck of a lot worse things this kid could be into. Yes, he didn't come clean to you right away, but he did to his mom, and soon after did the right thing with you. He really doesn't sound like such a bad kid.

Your parenting is absolutely none of my business, but, I think not trusting this kid b/c of one ticket incident, that turned out OK, is a bit harsh. But there are probably other issues I have no knowledge of that have made this decision for you.

Just an opinion. If I've offended, I am sorry!
 
I think we all worried how our parents would react the first time we got into real trouble.

I know that I told the cops not to call my old man and wake him, I would spend the night in jail, thank you.

My wishes weren't granted. My old man was cool, he said that he knew this day was coming.
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I agree with DrinkDuff77 - If this is what constitutes 'reckless' or 'unacceptable' behaviour out of an 18-year old for you, count your blessings! There are a heck of a lot worse things this kid could be into. Yes, he didn't come clean to you right away, but he did to his mom, and soon after did the right thing with you. He really doesn't sound like such a bad kid.

Your parenting is absolutely none of my business, but, I think not trusting this kid b/c of one ticket incident, that turned out OK, is a bit harsh. But there are probably other issues I have no knowledge of that have made this decision for you.

Just an opinion. If I've offended, I am sorry!





No offense taken. You can only pass judgment via what you read here. There is a long and messy story with this child. Of the 4 siblings he has been the biggest heartache and headache. He has made strides in the past year to clean up his act by attending college and has a job. And we have praised him for that. But both his Mother and I worry about "backsliding" into his old ways and it puts him under a microscope when any incident occurs. Yes, in the overall scheme of things this ticket is no big deal. And I'm sure he'll own up and pay it.

It really boils down to respect and trust are earned, not given. And while we have seen improvement both his Mother and I feel he has a way to go.
 
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