Food Mishaps

Messages
13,132
Location
By Detroit
I was in the habit of giving the ketchup a good vigorous shaking before opening it. That way it would pour a lot easier. Once I tried that in a restaurant and the previous patron had not screwed the cap on. Ketchup went up the wall and both my date and the waitress got a good laugh on me. Another time we got pizza for lunch at the print shop. I grabbed two slices and flopped down in one of the office swivel chairs only to have it flip on its back. I ended up with the pizza, gooey side down, on my face. Fortunately the pizza was not too hot.
 
Messages
2,636
Location
Arizona
When I still lived at home my younger sister tried to make microwave popcorn. Instead of 3:30 she entered 33:00. Man did that ever stink!
 
Messages
187
Location
California
When I was around 10 years old I was frying an egg..... I turned around to look at the clock to see what time it was and then like an idiot just reached out for the handle of the frying pan without looking.... I missed and grabbed the burner..... [Bang Head] Didnt take long and my palm was a big water blister..... But I did learn my lesson and never pulled that stunt again.
 
Messages
17,359
Location
Silicon Valley
The first time I try to cook my own food (scramble egg) I end up using water instead of oil in the pan. I knew I would screw up the first time and try something failsafe.
 
Messages
47,788
Location
Everson WA - Pacific NW USA
How about when the China karaoke girl put the whole baby octopus in my mouth? I can eat thin sliced tako and 30 minutes of some things might be fun - but not continuous chewing. I had to spit it out.
 
Messages
47,788
Location
Everson WA - Pacific NW USA
quote:
Was it live?
Dead but extremely chewy. Think Adidas after soccer sandals.
quote:
Normally its pretty hard to disagree with a China karaoke girl.
Somehow my wife knows this.
 
Messages
477
Location
Auburn Hills, Michigan
As a young man just out of High School sharing an apartment with a friend, we were trying to cook for meals for ourselves, we were sick of eating out, etc., my room mate was deep frying some frozen French Fries, the store bought kind in a bag, my roommate had the oil about 1/4" from the top of the pot, when he added the Frozen French Fries, they spattered and spit, the oil dribbled over the side of the pot and caught fire! I saw the flame through the colored glass window between the living room and kitchen, I thought he was playing with his lighter, the pot of French Fries was on fire. I blew at the pot hoping to put out the flame, no good, the fire was still going, my roommate grabbed a paper towel and placed it on the pot to hopefully smother the fire, the paper towel caught on fire, he rushed to the living room door, that leads to the out side, he opened the door and threw the burning paper outside, the beautiful brunette who lived next door had just gotten dressed up to go out, the wind was blowing her way, the burning paper towel hit her in the face! [Freak] She had the most frightened look on her face, ran back into her home... I ran down to the hallway at one end of the apartment building, saw a Fire Extinguisher, broke the glass, grabbed it and ran for the stove, one little puff from the Fire Extinguisher, the fire was out. We had to clean the smoke marks on the wall above the stove. I told my roommate he had to go next door to apologize to our neighbor, that was hard for him to do but he did it.
 
Messages
1,979
Location
Houston
kinda sorta food related: I discovered in college why you don't use Tide in the dishwasher. But after 2 days on rinse cycle the dishes sparkled like never before. So did the floor, the walls, the fridge, the stove, the cabinets.....
 
Messages
477
Location
Auburn Hills, Michigan
My roommate and I were learning to cook recipes from a Betty Crocker cook book we bought, we were making home made Tacos, we bought the Taco shells and hamburger, the lettuce, cheese, Salsa for the Tacos, Chili seasoning, Cummin, and last but not least a Clove of Garlic to minc in with the hamburger as we browned it off before adding the Chili powder and Cummin powder. We bought a globe of Garlic, we thought it was a Clove of Garlic, as the Recipe requested for the Tacos. We started peeling and chopping the Garlic Clove up to ad to the hamburger, we got half way through the Globe (whole Garlic) and we both agreed the Clove of Garlic (half of a whole Garlic bulb) was too much, we only used a half Clove (half Globe of Garlic), the whole kitchen smelled of Garlic. Later on, we realized that we had prepared a half bulb of Garlic for the hamburger when we thought we prepared a half Clove of garlic... oh well.... [Big Grin]
 
Messages
1,357
Location
California, USA
Never make splt pea soup in a pressure cooker. This happened to my Mom, 45 or so years ago. Pressure cookers were kind of the microwave oven of the day, things cooked much faster in them. There is a steam vent and calibrated weight on top to hold pressure and a safety relief plug to prevent explosions if things go wrong. The vent got plugged and eventually the safety plug blew out, spraying a stream of pea soup clear to the ceiling. At least the kitchen was already painted green.
 
Messages
1,979
Location
Houston
college roommate loved to cook. He loved meatloaf. 1st attempt was pan full of hamburger meat and such that was sitting at the bottom of a deep pool of grease. How to get rid of grease? called mom, she said "Use some bread next time." so next meatloaf had this squishy soggy thing in the middle, like a greasing filling of a Hostess cupcake... "Oh, you mean shread the bread first?" fast forward to a few weeks later and the next attempt: we kept finding small crunchy bits and thought it might be ground bone. "it's rice," he said. "but shouldn't you have cooked the rice first?"
 
Messages
563
Location
wisconsin
in my younger years,as im 47 and sill single, I was cooking a frozen pizza in a oven with a glass window,well decided to take a bit of shut eye till cooked,was waken up by my cat meowing loudly,,just opened my eyes after a couple of hours,and saw the reflection of flames on wall,,,what a smokey mess,,BL
 
Messages
23,591
You guys are like the guy in the Carl's Junior tv ad! You know, the guy who's trying to crack open eggs and makes a huge mess. [Wink] I once forgot a turkey in the oven and left it sizzling for over a day. When I finally got it out, it was the size of a chicken with bones protruding, and it sort of resembled a black mummy.
 
Messages
716
Location
San Gabriel Valley
I once forgot a turkey in the oven and left it sizzling for over a day. When I finally got it out, it was the size of a chicken with bones protruding, and it sort of resembled a black mummy. a fossilized turkey. [Big Grin]
 
...Or are they disabled for bongathongs? [LOL!] Now that right there is funny! With the wonderful aroma of a roasting turkey (at least at first) do y'all say "Hey, I'm gettin' hungry. Who wants KFC?" and ignore the big bird at home?
 
Messages
23,591
I was making pancakes in the morning, but because I was still very tired I wasn't paying much attention and mixed up the bottle of rum with the bottle of maple syrup (Same style bottle). As it turned out, those rum-soaked pancakes were declicious if you added a bit maple syrup. It's now a recipe. Start your day right -- with rum-laced pancakes! [Happy]
 
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