The physics department has come up with a new theory concerning the S. Claus phenomenon, namely, how it is accomplished. According to the physics people, who often commented upon the girth of S. Claus, suggests that the feat of global visitation coverage in one night can be explained by quantum gravity. The girth suggests a gravity anomaly surrounds S. Claus causing chronological tidal effects, allowing enough time to accomplish global visitation coverage in what appears to be one night. Evidence for this is given by observation of the raindeer. Raindeer watchers know that the noses of flying raindeer rudolphus actually glow white. (This thermodynamics problem is being investigated). The red colour reported by many, suggests that the white light is highly red shifted, indicating quantum gravity fluctuations at work. I, frankly, never understand what physicists are talking about. A much maligned group, and rightly so.