In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his
first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to
the stand. He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"
She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you
since you were a young boy, and frankly, you've
been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and
you manipulate people and talk about them behind
their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains
to realize you never will amount to anything more
than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."
The lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across
the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense
attorney?"
She again replied, "Why, yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he
was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he
has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with
anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the
entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three
different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him."
The defense attorney almost died.
The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very
quiet voice, said, "If either of you idiots asks
her if she knows me, I'll send you to the electric chair."
first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to
the stand. He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"
She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you
since you were a young boy, and frankly, you've
been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and
you manipulate people and talk about them behind
their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains
to realize you never will amount to anything more
than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."
The lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across
the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense
attorney?"
She again replied, "Why, yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he
was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he
has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with
anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the
entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three
different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him."
The defense attorney almost died.
The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very
quiet voice, said, "If either of you idiots asks
her if she knows me, I'll send you to the electric chair."
