A Guy Walks Into a Bar

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Jun 2, 2003
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... and the bartender says, "We have a drink that's named after you." "Really," says the grasshopper, "you have a drink named Irving?"
 
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Dec 12, 2002
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'Stralia
Bartender says "we don't serve string". String goes outside, does some yogic moves, ruffles up his "hair" and walks back in. Bartender says "Aren't you that piece of string I wouldn't serve earlier ?' String says "I'm a frayed knot"
 
Joined
Dec 21, 2003
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Northern CA
goes into a bar in New England. He asks the bartender, "Did you go to Harvard?" The bartender says, "Yale." The North Carolinan says, "DID YOU GO TO HARVARD?"
 
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Dec 21, 2003
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Northern CA
"Give me a beer before problems start!" Again, the man orders a beer again saying, "Give me a beer before problems start!" The bartender looks confused. This goes on for a while, and after the fifth beer the bartender is totally confused and asks the man, "When are you going to pay for these beers?" The man answers, "Ah, now the problems start!"
 
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Dec 21, 2003
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Northern CA
He orders a beer. The bartender says, "That'll be $10. You know, we don't get many kangaroos coming in here, you know." The kangaroo says, "At $10 a beer, it's not hard to understand."
 
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Sep 28, 2002
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39,802
Location
Pottstown, PA
 Originally Posted By: XS650
He orders a beer. The bartender says, "That'll be $10. You know, we don't get many kangaroos coming in here, you know." The kangaroo says, "At $10 a beer, it's not hard to understand."
Ah ..from the Playboy depiction. We don't get many kangaroos in here and at these prices you won't get many more. That had to be from the mid 60's I couldn't find the real one
 
Joined
Oct 25, 2007
Messages
1,373
Location
Somerset County, PA
 Originally Posted By: Gary Allan
Neutron grabs a seat at the bar Hey, bartender. How much for a mixed drink? For you, no charge.
Neutron - "Are you sure?" Bartender (who is a Proton) - "I'm positive".
 
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Sep 28, 2002
Messages
39,802
Location
Pottstown, PA
My mother had the same problem in KMart ...and she wasn't from Brazil. Where's the yahn? I beg your pardon? Yahn. Can you spell it, please? Y-A-AH-N - YAHN Oh ..yarn ..aisle 5, about halfway down.
 
Joined
Jul 16, 2005
Messages
3,730
Location
SE PA
Was in a bar one time, and this somewhat tipsy guy walked up to the lady sitting next to me and started to hit on her. She looked at him and said "I already have one a..hole in my pants. I don't want another." After the laughter died down, she got free drinks till she left.
 
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