I was speaking with my neighbor, and we got on the topic of motor oil. He always has an interesting story of some sort, and today was no exception. Although I find some of his stories hard to believe, they keep ending up to be true. Anyway, he claimed that he hates his company car (Lincoln LS). He had previously told me that he is the 2nd person to have this car. The first driver of the car was let go by the company, and appearantly that did not go over well. Before turning in the car, the prev driver loaded all of the various cavities of the car with dog food (the goal being that the car would attract dogs, racoons, rats, etc..). I did not fully believe this. I have ridden in the car, and the rear end makes a lot of noise. No one knows why, but the prev driver might have tampered with it. Long story short, my neighbor claims that he will not change the oil, so the engine will fail, and he will get a new car. I did not fully believe him. Either he is joking, or at least exagerating. Well, I called him on his oil change story. I came over to his house with my Blackstone sample kit and pump. He checked the oil change sticker on the windshield, which indicated the oil was 18 months old, and had 26,000 miles. He said that was done immediately before the car was turned over to him, and that the hood had never been opened since he has had the car. We next opened the hood to check the oil. As the hood was lifted, I heard the noise of small things sliding around inside the hood. When I asked what the noise was, he said "that is the dog food from the prev driver". Indeed, some kibble did fall out. Another story verified. Next we checked the dip stick. The oil barely registers, only a little on the end. The oil is a dark brown/black, but not as dark as I expected. We then pulled a sample from the dip stick tube, which will go out in Monday's mail. I will post the results as soon as I get them. The results should be interesting. What should we expect from this UOA? Has anyone here ever submitted a UOA of a dino oil at 26,000 miles (with no make up oil added)?