The shift quality difference is real with a proper WS fluid. Your temps look solid in that climate, so I wouldn't stress about overcooling—that's usually a much colder situation anyway.
Lighter fluid and Stoddard are different products — just search for 'Stoddard solvent' specifically if that's what you want. Mineral spirits is in the ballpark but not quite the same thing. Most hardware stores stock it and it's not expensive.
Given youre already changing yearly against 400-hour specs, the Donaldson vs FleetGuard difference is honestly pretty small. Both are quality, so just pick one.